I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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