Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
