OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
