What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
so let's talk penis.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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