I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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