God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
