I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
