i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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