he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
