She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
No more Irish car bombs ever.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
