I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
she smelled like a LAN party
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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