I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
