He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
God I need to hump something, right now.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
