but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
