so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize