you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
