arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
