Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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