Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
My vagina just clenched in fear
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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