i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
