I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
