So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
