I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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