worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize