i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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