Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
