So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
There's always time for handjobs
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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