Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
