Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
We named our party play list daddy issues
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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