My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
There r osticjed everywhere
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
