You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
