is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize