Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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