Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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