evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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