no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
