well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
