His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
