i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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