Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
