I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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