Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
