We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
