I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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