Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

actually, I'm a sock model

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(239): View more from Florida

just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.

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(419): View more from Ohio

i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.

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(727): View more from Florida

In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.

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(253): View more from Washington

So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?

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(309): View more from Illinois

Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.

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(315): View more from New York

Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again

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