we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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