Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize