he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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