just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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