and you said cock pushups were impossible
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
two words...techno handjob
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize