honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
