My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
