Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
