he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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